Entourage – Season 4, Episode 7 – “The Day F@#kers”

Hello MMM nation.  It is my honor to contribute to this space while our friend, the Maven, is off traveling the world.  I did my homework and watched both Entourage and Flight of the Conchords last night.  I’d much rather talk about Entourage though, as I haven’t seen that much of Flight and what I have seen, while funny, is pretty similar.  However, this ep of Entourage was a very nice change of pace from the beginning of this season, and i really enjoyed the episode.  We see the standard episode start with a shot of a hot waitress and the four guys seated for a meal.  Their usual banter picks up steam quickly, and turns into a full fledged wager.  I personally am a huge fan of any bet, and I liked the wrinkle in this one – the person who had to get laid had nothing riding on it, so finding the first tranny on the corner wasn’t going to win Vince or Drama the bet.  Immediately we see turtle/drama’s strategy – craigslist.  Nice choice.  Loved the negotiations, and the look on the girl’s face next to them was classic.  Vince’s strategy?  Go to a pool filled with hot girls, sit down, immediately get hit on by 2 hot girls.  In a disappointing turn, but one necessary for the episode to work, Eric is too distracted/despondent to hit on his girl with any effort.  It turns out he is still thinking about Sloane…and speaking of Sloane, look who’s hanging out at the hottie pool.  And not only is she there, she blows every other girl at the place out of the light blue, smoking hot babe-filled water.  Not to go on a rant here( Yeah, a Dennis Miller reference. I work with what I have.  And yes, this is part of the rant) but who the hell is representing Emmanuelle Chiriqui?  Is their goal to keep her from becoming a big star?  Every guy I’ve ever talked to is in love with her.  And what has she been in?  A tiny bit part in 3 episodes of “Unscripted”( a show that I liked, but fair warning, I’m not from LA and know nothing at all about the acting/audition game.  It could be totally unrealistic, but anyway its ten 30 minute episodes…and did I mention E-Chirs is in it?)  Back to Emmanuelle, she also appeared in something called “National Lampoon’s Adam and Eve”, starring as Eve alongside…Cameron Douglas, Michael’s son.  Who first appeared in a movie with an English language title at the age of 25, with 3 of his other family members in the cast.  Way to work for it, Cam.  He’s pulling the Douglas name down like an anchor.  And speaking of once proud names…Are you still breathing over there, National Lampoon??  If I was this age 20 years ago I could absolutely see myself being a huge fan of the NL franchise.  In the early 80’s, after Animal House and Vacation, any new Lampoon movie coming out would’ve been immediate cause to jump in my car (which, incidentally, still could’ve been my car if this was 20 years ago) and head to the theater.  Now?  They pump about asinine garbage like “Dorm Daze”, “Senior Trip”, and the same terrible actors and good looking enough girls traipsing around in no clothes in plotless, stereotypical movies.  I would be positively ashamed of anyone I knew if I found out they saw a recent National Lampoon movie in a theater.  And this is coming from someone who frequently argues that Dumb and Dumber is a classic comedy, and who has all 3 Mighty Ducks movies in my all time top 5 watched list.  The other two, since you’re dying to know?  Rookie of the Year and Down Periscope.  But anyway, I actually have a serious industry related question about National Lampoon and then I’ll keep talking about Entourage.  So, say you have a great comedy script.  Its hilarious, its about young 20’s guys trying to hook up with hot chicks, you’ve got Vince Vaughn signed on, theres a deeper element that makes the last hour not funny – in other words, it’s a guaranteed smash hit.  Would it be worth it to dig up the old National Lampoon brand and say “this is the one that puts it back on top…Animal House, Vacation, drop down to Van Wilder, drop 50 stories lower with Dorm Daze, but now National Lampoon is back”.  Would a great comedy even be enough to save the Lampoon name right now?  And yes, I’m sure a different guy is responsible for Animal House and Adam and Eve – at least I hope.  But a brand is a brand, and I personally think that Lampoon COULD be saved…but it won’t.  No one will ever be trying to say that the movie they wrote, directed, acted in, best boy gripped for, etc. is being made by National Lampoon.  Not after they have sunk so low.  So RIP, National Lampoon.  It must’ve been nice knowing you had a name you could count on to present you a classic comedic movie every few years. 

So, yeah, that Entourage last night…

I loved the Ari storyline with his high-class PI.  Any kind of mysterious consultant/aide to the wealthy is always a plus for a show.  The most badass person fitting this description is, of course, The Transporter, followed by the guy in Layer Cake who can “find anyone in the world in ten minutes.”  Does that come with a money-back guarantee?  Anyway, Ari has evidently used this guy to track down ridiculous information in the past.  He sends him on a mission to dig up dirt on the school principal, played by the voice of Homer Simpson himself, Dan Castalanetta.  At this point, the episode was pretty close to perfect.  We had 0 of Lloyd’s personal issues, 0 of Drama and Turtle off on a money-making scheme that couldn’t have been more obviously destined to fail, none of Billy Walsh’s rage and hindering of Vince’s career.  In fact, Vince’s movie career wasn’t mentioned once in this episode.  It was certainly a refreshing break from the mundane bitching about Medillin that has dominated the early part of this season.  And, in another stunning development, Ari has a son named Jonah!  I hear that show producers named the kid after their most dedicated internet blogger, the Maven himself, as a way of saying thanks.  That information is entirely credible.  I’m extremely well connected in Hollywood.  Be sure to spread it to your friends.

After all that set-up, I was just hoping the endings of the various stories lived up to their beginnings.  I think they did pretty well, though obviously some ended better than others.  E gets rejected by Sloane (who “met someone new”.  Very mysterious.  Hopefully the producers are lining up a ridiculous guest star.), then decides to give the British chick a call.  Always pays to have options, as they say.  I like the end of this story a lot.  Even in a self-contained episode such as this, we get some plot information that will surely play out in the coming episodes.  E will absolutely be pouting and thinking of Sloane when we next get in touch with his feelings.  But I’m just gonna say right now that any more than 3 episodes of E plotting to get Sloane back better be great scheming to keep me interested.  I just don’t have the patience to deal with him sulking for the rest of the season.  And if you think I forgot about my Emmanuelle Chiriqui rant, well then you just don’t know me very well.  Her upcoming movie?  She stars alongside my new Hollywood nemesis Justin Long (Waiting, the Apple guy from the commercials, an unwatchable turn in “The Break Up”) in a movie about two people who fight to stop an Indian Casino being built on a historic battlefield.  Sounds like a case for the zoning board!  Couldn’t you see Emmanuelle in the Rachel McAdams role in Wedding Crashers, or the Katherine Heigl role in Knocked Up?  Not saying she would’ve been better, but she has to start getting in better movies.  You can etch it in stone that in ten years she will be playing the way too hot wife of some pudgy moron on a CBS sitcom.  So, Emmanuelle, you have ten years to cash in on your universal admiration and actually appear in a movie people want to see.  Get to work!

As I was saying, In the 2^nd story line, Ari finishes up his tender maneuvering with an “I love this town” declaration, followed by a triple fist pump, a pause, then a double fist pump.  Ari Gold is in the only character on TV I would even consider taking seriously after that line – Imagine if after finishing off another dead hooker case, the guy on CSI grabbed a hot dog from a vendor, looked up and said “I love this town!”?  It would be a historically cheesy level of television.   But it works here.  And, to top it off, there was a legitimate “Wait, this show isn’t ending now right?” worry from me as we had the long shot of Ari running to his car, the music playing, and him turning the ignition…exactly the way they would end the show if it was ending now.  Obviously, this was needless paranoia, because of course we cut to Turtle and Drama in the car outside the “prom queen’s” house.  Turtle bitches out, but handily has brought a J from home to help him pass the time…time that passes while Drama is inside doing what?  Of course Turtle has to investigate, setting up the ending.  I thought it was hilarious, a great way to end the episode.  I’m ALWAYS in favor of a purely comedic story instead of some kind of plot beyond the comedic situation.  While this is usually true for any show I watch, it is especially true for Entourage, whose characters just aren’t interesting enough to me to really care about their drama.  But, in terms of comedy, this is one of the episodes that I have enjoyed the most.  And there was 0 plot advancement.  As for the great ending, there’s no use in really talking about it.  If you saw it, you saw it.  I’ve got nothing to add to that.  If you didn’t see it, and came to check out the Maven’s opinion on if it was worth watching, then I’m sorry he isn’t here to give you that.  But if by association you think that my opinion is worth anything, then, for its return to its silly, comedic ways that I thought had passed it by, I give this episode of Entourage an A-.